Whatcha Lookin For?

Being my age and single, I often get asked about what I'm looking for in a spouse. My answer to that question has changed over the years. When I was young (early twenties), and didn't know much, I typically responded that he had to be cute, a member of the church, and have a good job.

By my mid-twenties my response had changed to he needs to be a returned missionary, have a sense of humor and be able to support our family.

As I approached my thirties, I started to wise up a bit and my response became that my future husband needed to speak english, be living on his own and not still with his parents, have no outstanding felony charges, and not be addicted to pornography.

Throughout the years, as I would review my qualifications for a spouse, I never found them unreasonable, silly, or unrealistic. I mean it wasn't as if I was saying that I would only marry someone who had green eyes, brown hair, and had served a mission in France. I felt that the qualities I was looking for in a spouse were appropriate and would help me find a great husband.

Now, as I approach my mid-thirties and find myself still looking for a spouse, I have found that my qualifications have shifted once again. I have found myself thinking recently of the male influences I have had in my life and what I respected and valued most about them. As I thought of their qualities, I have started to piece together what kind of man I really hope to marry.


I have been blessed to have a father who is a worthy Priesthood holder. A father who knows the importance of living righteously every day so that he can use the Priesthood to bless his family when needed. My father is also an "example of the believers" and has a strong testimony of the gospel. My dad has always been a great example of service and friendship. I'll never forget when he told me that the happiest times in his life have been when he has been serving others.

So, the first 3 items on my list come from the example of my father.

• Strong testimony of Jesus Christ
• Worthy Priesthood holder
• Serves others
  

I have three brothers and each of them knows the value of hard work. All of them have had jobs that I know I could never do, and I am in awe at how hard they work to support their families. Each of them understands the importance of families and they are willing to make any needed sacrifice for their loved ones.

All of my brothers have inherited a great sense of humor from our parents, and they know how to laugh and have fun. Many times, my mood has shifted because of their ability to make me laugh. I'm grateful for their personalities and their ability to find humor in the small things in life.

Over the years, as I have watched Mark, Matt, and Martin evolve from boys into men, and then watched as they became fathers, I have been so proud of them. They are men that I look up to and respect, and I'm honored to be their sister.

So, the next 3 items on my list have come from my brothers:

• Upholds the importance of the family
• Hard-worker - willing to support the family
• Sense of Humor

So, there's my list. That's what I'm looking for in a spouse. Some may say it is too short, or too long, or too detailed, or not detailed enough, but for me, this list is just right.

Note: Please don't ever tell me I'm being too picky or that I'm not being realistic. I know that there are men out there who meet these requirements, and I'm not going to settle for anything less. If, you do, however, feel the urge in the future to tell me that I am being picky, I reserve the right to punch you.